The Ups and Downs of Penile Implants

A man became impotent due to removal of his cancerous prostate. His urologist recommended a penile implant, which can readily pumped up when an erection is needed.

"You can have a regular grade plastic implant, or a harder one. The latter gives a better erection, but your penis may be hard to tuck away when it's not inflated," said the doctor.

"Well, I don't want to be embarrassed in public, so give me the regular grade."

A few months later he came back to the doctor with a penis all bent out of shape. "My word," said the doctor, "You must have had a rough time!"

"Yes," said the patient, "After a year of no erections, my partner and I were as eager as newlyweds. I think I need the harder implant."

Six months later, he returned with a sorrier looking penis. The doctor exclaims, "Not again! Who is the woman who can do this to you? I've never seen the likes of it."

The doctor was determined to succeed, so he put in a stainless steel implant. A year later, he ran into the man at a party and asked him how the implant was working.

"My love life is fantastic, doc, but I have one problem. I can't get past the metal detector at the airport.