What's the difference between a hobo and a homo?A hobo has no friends and a homo has friends up the ass!

A guy was riding down the road when he saw a pretty young lady standing with her thumb out. The driver pulled over and offered her a ride. She got in, and they started driving."My name is June...

Q: What will history remember Bill Clinton as?A: The President after Bush!

A guy dials his home and a strange woman answers.The guy says, ''Who is this?''''This is the maid,'' answers the woman.''We don't have a maid,'' says the man.The woman says, ''I was hired this...

A newly married hillbilly couple decided they wanted children, but didn't know how to go about it. Questions and conversations with friends and relatives proved no help, until a neighbor said they...

How do you give a hillbilly a circumcision?Kick his sister in the jaw.

A man with an average handicap decides to play a round of golf one day. He heads to the starters' area where he is paired with a woman.''Damn, a woman," he says. "This is going to be horrible.''As...

How do you tell if your boyfriend has a high sperm count?If you have to chew before you swallow.

A guy gets home early from work and hears strange noises coming from the bedroom.  He rushes upstairs to find his wife naked on the bed, sweating and panting."What's up?" he asks."I'm...

An old farmer and his wife had a bunch of pigs, and every morning the farmer would head out to feed them. And every morning, he would see all the pigs screwing up a storm. He would get turned on by...

Q: What do a hemophiliac and a virgin have in common?A: One prick and they're done.

Three guys died and when they got to the pearly gates, St. Peter met them there. St. Peter said, "I know that you guys are forgiven because you're here. But before I let you into heaven, I have to...

John and Bob were inseparable childhood friends . One night, they both died in a terrible car accident.When John woke up in heaven, he began to search for Bob but could not find him anywhere. Very...

Q: What's the worst way to get a headache?A: When she sneezes.

Q: How do you give a blonde more head room?A: Adjust the steering wheel.

There was this guy who always went out drinking with his friends. He would always come home very late. One night, while he was at the bar he told them his secret for being able to sneak in...

The preacher stood before the congregation. ''Brothers and Sisters, I understand that there have been some he'n and she'n going on. I will not tolerate fornication in my church. All of those who...

I hate to brag, but if I was sitting on the toilet, and got the hiccups, I'd siphon the bowl dry!

If a light sleeper can't sleep with a light on, can a hard sleeper sleep with a hard on?

Did you hear that Bill Gates bought the world-wide rights to Viagra?He's renaming it MICROHARD.