What's the definition of innocence?A nun working in a condom factory, thinking she's making little sleeping bags for mice.

Why do women have sex with their eyes closed?Because they can't stand seeing a man having a good time!

Why do women rub there eys when they getup in the morning?Because they don't have balls to scratch.

Scientists have released a new form of Viagra, it comes in an eyedrop form and makes you look well hard.

The other day, my friends and I went to this Ladies Night Club. One of the girls wanted to impress us, so she pulled out a $10 bill. The dancer came over to us, and my friend licked the $10 and...

Ru Paul, Bill Gates, and Roger Ebert are all struck by lightning on the same day. All three find themselves in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates. They start begging him to give them another...

What's the difference between erotic and kinky?Erotic is when you use a feather, kinky is when you use the whole chicken!

A man walked into the ladies department of a Macy's, and walked up to the woman behind the counter and said, "I'd like to buy a bra for my wife"What type of bra?" asked the clerk."Type?" inquires...

Why is Clinton having such a hard time deciding what to do with Elian Gonzalez?Because the last time he decided where to put a Cuban he was almost impeached.

When I was young, I had no sense, Stuck my dick in an electric fence. It curled my hairs, it tickled my balls, It made me crap my overalls.

What did the Egyptian man say to the Egyptian woman?"Come behind the pyramid, and I'll make you a mummy!"

One day, while Sue was cleaning under the bed, she found a small box. Curious, she opened it and found 3 eggs and 10,000 dollars. A little bit suspicious, she confronted her husband of twenty years...

Why don't they teach drivers ed. and sex ed. in the same day in Arkansas?It's too hard on the mules.

In the Garden of Eden stood AdamWith his hand in the crack of his madam.It filled him with mirth'Cause on this whole earth,There were only two balls and he had 'em.

There once was a very distraught woman, who was upset because she had not had a date in quite some time. She decided she would seek the medical expertise of Dr. Kayoto, the very well-known Japanese...

What's a guys favourite thing to eat?His girlfriend.

What's the difficult thing about eating vegetables?Getting around the wheelchair.

Why does the Easter Bunny hide his eggs? Because he doesn't want anyone to know he's screwing a chicken.

Q. Why did the man put condoms on his ears during sex?A. He didn't want to have hearing aids.

There was this hunk at a trade fair, flashing his big muscles and repeating, “Ten tons of dynamite, ten tons of dynamite,â� while eyeing the females around.One young lady was...