A software expert claims:“My software never has bugs -- it just develops random features.â�

Did you hear about the two radio antenhnas that got married?The wedding was terrible, but the reception was excellent!

Q: Why didn't Intel call the Pentium, the 586?A: Because they added 486 and 100 on the first Pentium and got 585.999983605.

Q: How many Object Oriented programmers does it take to change a lightbulb?A: None, they send it a message, and it changes itself.

Did you hear that Netscape is moving to Tel-Aviv, Israel?They're going to rename themself "Netan-Yahoo"

My computer isn`t that nervous...it`s just a bit ANSI.Terminal glare: A look that kills...Life would be much easier if I had the source codeComputers are only human.To iterate is human; to recurse,...

The Yankees have a monopoly game.The Mets have a monopoly game.Microsoft has a monopoly, no game but a lesson for us all.

1. You must first remove the plastic cover. By doing so you agree to accept and honor Microsoft rights to all TV dinners. 2. You may not give anyone else a bite of your dinner (which would...

If Microsoft operated Restaurants Patron: Waiter!Waiter: Hi, my name is Bill, and I'll be your SupportWaiter. What seems to be the problem?Patron: There's a fly in my soup!Waiter: Try again, maybe...

Q: How many Microsoft engineers does it take to screw in a light bulb?A: None. They just declare darkness the standard 

1. Every time they repainted the lines on the road you would have to buy a new car.2. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason, and you would just accept this, restart and drive...

NORTH POLE (API) - MICROSOFT announced an agreement with Santa Claus Industries to acquire Christmas at a press conference held via satellite from Santa's summer estate somewhere in the southern...

A bachelor asked the computer to find him the perfect mate:"I want a companion who is small and cute, loves water sports, and enjoys group activities."Back came the answer:"Marry a penguin."

How many IBM PC owners does it take to screw in a light bulb?Only one, but he'll have to go out and buy the light bulb adaptor card first, which is extra.

What do you call two lesbians in a canoe?Fur traders.

Person turns on the computer without a keyboard plugged in.When she turns on the computer, the computer finds out that there is no keyboard attached and it gives a "Keyboard Error" message.She then...

Q: Why are Michael Jackson's pants so small?A: Because they aren't his!

It says: "Press Any Key"It means: "Press any key you like but I'm not moving."It says: "Press A Key"(This one's a programmers joke. Nothing happens unless you press the "A" key.)It says: "Fatal...

10) E-Mail flames from some guy named 'Fluffy.'9) Traces of kitty litter in your keyboard.8) You find you've been subscribed to strange newsgroups like alt.recreational.catnip.7) Your web browser...

Customer Service Rep: Can you install LOVE? Customer: I can do that. I'm not very technical, but I think I am ready to install now. What do I do first? Customer Service Rep: The first step is to...