Funny Jokes

Funny Jokes Page 285 of 285
Sep 28, 2004
The Economist 631 hits
The May Day parade in Moscow is the largest, most important military parade of the year. For 1992's parade, Yeltsin and Gorbachev invited Bill Clinton to come watch it with them. The parade...
Sep 28, 2004
One day, Clinton called the White House interior decorator into the Oval Office. He was very furious and said, "Chelsea is very upset because she thinks she has the ugliest room in the entire...
Sep 28, 2004
Clinton returns from a vacation in Arkansas and walks down the steps of Air Force One with two pigs under his arms. At the bottom of the steps, the honor guardsman steps forward and remarks, ...
Sep 28, 2004
Clinton is looking out of the window and he notices that someone has urinated the message, BILL SUCKS! on the White House Lawn. Furious, he orders the FBI to take urine and handwriting samples...
Sep 28, 2004
Clinton (4) 519 hits
Q. Bill and Hillary are on a sinking boat. Who gets saved? A. The nation. Q. What do you get when you cross a crooked politician with a dishonest lawyer? A. Chelsea! Q: What does Bill...
Sep 28, 2004
Clinton (3) 685 hits
Bill and Hillary are at a restaurant. The waiter tells them tonight's special is chicken almondine and fresh fish. "The chicken sounds good; I'll have that," Hillary says. The waiter nods....
Sep 28, 2004
Bill and Hillary are at the first baseball game of the season. The umpire walks up to the VIP section and yells something, and suddenly Clinton grabs Hillary by the collar and throws her over the...
Sep 28, 2004
Seen on a bumper sticker: IF CLINTON IS THE ANSWER, THEN IT MUST BE A STUPID QUESTION. Seen on another bumper sticker: CLINTON HAPPENS
Sep 28, 2004
Cakes and Ale 465 hits
Here is an (apparently) true story someone found regarding exams at Cambridge University. It seems that during an examination one day a bright young student popped up and asked the examiner to...
Sep 28, 2004
A new guy in town walks into a bar and reads a sign that hangs over the bar: FREE BEER FOR THE PERSON WHO CAN PASS THE TEST! So the guy asks the bartender what the test is. Bartender: "Well,...
Sep 28, 2004
A drunken man staggered into a Catholic church, sat down in the Confessional and said nothing. The priest is waiting and waiting and waiting. The priest coughs to attract the drunk man's...
Sep 28, 2004
A guy walked into a bar one day and said to the barman, "Give me six double vodkas." The barman says, "Wow! you must have had one hell of a day." "Yes, I've just found out my older...
Sep 28, 2004
Pig In A Bar 578 hits
A lady goes into a bar with her goose. Then the bartender comes up to her and says, "Why did you have to bring the pig in with you?" Then the lady answered, "Excuse me, I think this is a...
Sep 28, 2004
In a restaurant, a disgusted customer says: Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup? The waiter, after taking a close look says: It looks to me like the breaststroke, Sir
Sep 28, 2004
A man is driving home, when he is pulled over by a patrolman for a broken blinker. The cop looks into the guys' car and sees a collection of knives in the backseat. "Sir," the cop says. "Why...
Sep 28, 2004
Here's a dilemma... With all your honor and dignity, what would you do? Please don't answer without giving it serious thought. By giving an honest answer you will be able to test where you...
Sep 28, 2004
One day, a stranger walked into a bar. After ordering a beer, he saw a horse over in the corner with a huge pot full of money in it. When asked the bartender replied:" It's a contest. Try to...
Sep 28, 2004
Three women are in a gym locker room dressing up to play raquetball, suddenly, a guy runs through the room wearing nothing but a bag over his head and passes the three women. He passes the...
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