Q: What did Michael Jackson say when he got back to Never land Ranch from drug rehab?A: You know, I feel like a new boy!

Q. What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson?A. One was the first to walk on the moon and the other fucks little boys up the ass.

Q: Why does Michael really need to go to rehab?A: He's a crack addict.

What does DIANA stand for?Died In A Nasty Accident!

Would Diana have been buried if she had been married to Dodi?No she would then have been mummy-Fied.

What's the difference between Mother Theresa and Diana?Around 5 days.

How did Di and Charles disagree about Modern Architecture?Di was wrapt about pre-stressed cement.

What is Di´s new job?Model at Versace´s

Q: What do Michael Jackson and Miss Bobbit have in common?A: They both played with little wieners.

Q: What do Celebrity Michael Jackson and Michael Jordan have in common?A: They both play ball in the Minor League.

Q: What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Mick Dittman?A: Mick Dittman DOES have a license to ride 4 year olds.

What is the difference between Michigan State and Princess Di?Michigan State waits to get out of the tunnel to get killed.

Q: What do Michael's rear and an LA jail have in common?A: Both hold the juice.

Q: How are Michael's friends dealing with the problem?A: They're all standing behind him.

Q: Why's Michael trying out for the NBA?A: He's a crack shooter.

Q: Why is Michael so tough?A: He can lick any kid on the block.

Q: Why doesn't Michael sleep with boys anymore?A: He's tired of all the cracks.

Q: How does Michael like to party?A: He sips a couple of Tall Boys.

Q: Why does Michael like children so much?A: He knows how they feel.

Q. Have you heard about Michael Jackson's new book?A. It's called, "The In's and Out's of Child Rearing"