Little Jimmy bit his fingernails all the time. His parents tried everything to get him to stop, but to no avail. Finally, his mother, exasperated, decided to tell him a little white lie to get him...

Little Jimmy, Little Billy, and Jimmy's father were at an Art Museum. Little Jimmy was looking at a picture of someone in la carriage being pulled by a horse. Little Jimmy brought his father...

A teacher asked her class, "What do you want out of life?" A little girl in the back row raised her hand and said, "All I want out of life is four little animals." The...

A drunk man stumbles into the bar to the only other customer and asks if the man would buy him a drink. The second man says yes. They have a drink, and the first man decides to fill the quiet...

"An extraordinarily handsome man decided he had the responsibility to marry the perfect woman so they could produce beautiful children beyond compare With that as his mission he...

Dear Dr. Ruth, I'm writing to tell you my problem. It seems I have been married to a sex maniac for the past 22 years. He makes love to me regardless of what I am doing. Ironing, washing...

After a hardy Indiana rainstorm filled all the potholes in the streets and alleys, a young mother watched her two little boys playing in the puddle through her kitchen window. The older of the two,...

At a dinner party, several of the guests were arguing whether men or women were more trustworthy. 'No woman,' said one man, scornfully, 'can keep a secret.' 'I don't know about that,'...

A blonde and a brunette go parachuting. The blonde jumps first, pulls her parachute cord, and slowly drifts in the air and enjoys the view. The brunette jumps after her and pulls her...

THE NBA PLAYER ADOPTION PROGRAM NEEDS YOU! With an NBA player's strike against the team owners looming, now is the time for us to show the world just how much we care. It's just not right....

Q: Why does the law prohibit sex between lawyers and their clients? A: To prevent clients from being billed twice for what is essentially the same service.

3 men die in a car wreck and are sent to the pearly gates. Having all lived good lives they were all allowed in but they had certain restrictions. God told them that he would ask them a question....

A lonely female crab was walking down the beach one evening when she noticed a male crab coming toward her—but he was walking straight and not sideways! Impressed by his talent, she...

Two guys are out walking their dogs one day and decide to stop at a bar to get a drink. When they get there, however, there's a sign on the door that says, "No Pets Allowed." The...

A man and his doctor are discussing a surgery the man will soon undergo. The doctor asks if there are any last questions. "Doctor, will I be able to play my violin after this surgery?"...

You know your a redneck when there is 15 cars in your driveway and the only one that moves is your house.

Yo mommas so stupid she fucked waldo.

There was once a big ol' tough bear strolling through the forest looking for some silly hunter to maul when he suddenly got the urge to pass the last hunter he had eaten. He stopped by the side of...

A married man goes to confessional and tells the priest, "I had an affair with a woman... almost." The priest says, "What do you mean, almost?" The man says,...

A husband and wife and their two sons are watching TV. She looks at her husband and winks at him, he gets the message and says, "Excuse us for a few minutes boys, we're going up to our room...