What is another name for a masturbating bull?Beef Strokinoff.

A little old man stumbles into a biker bar and asks, "Does anyone knows who's Doberman Pincher is outside chained up?The burliest, ugliest and hairiest guy in the joint stands up and mutters, "It's...

What is the difference between a BMW & a porcupine?A porcupine has pricks on the outside.

Why Do Gorillas Have Big Nostrils?Because They Have Big Fingers

Once there was a bear taking a dump in the forest.A rabbit walks by and the bear says,''Hey rabbit, does poo stick to your fur?" ''No,'' says rabbit. "That's great!" says bear.And bear picks up...

Why did the ram fall off the cliff?Because he didn't see the ewe turn.

What did the apple say to the worm?You're boring me.

Q. Why did the ape run around with a piece of raw meat on his head?A. He thought he was a gorilla. (griller)!

Admitting his 0-4 record is not impressive "on paper," trainers announced that Lucky,a German shepherd guide dog for the blind in Wuppertal, Germany, is available for his fifth owner.Lucky led his...

One day a man is walking down the street when he sees an old man with a nice looking dog.He goes over to the man and asks: 'does your dog bite?' the old man replies 'No never'.When the man bends...

What do Alexander the Great and Kermit the Frog have in common?Their middle name.

What weighs 2,000 pounds and pinches? An elephant wearing a tight tuxedo!

How do you make a slow reindeer fast?Don't feed it!

A male frog goes to a psychic.The psychic tells him, "You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you."The frog becomes excited, "This is great! Will I meet...

A magician was employed by a Shipping Line to entertain the passengers during cruises.The captain owned a parrot which always insisted on being part of the acts put on by the magician. He would...

A lady awoke one morning and discovered her dog was not moving. She called her vet who asked her to bring the dog in. After a brief examination, the vet pronounced the dog dead."Are you sure?", the...

A hungry lion was roaming through the jungle looking for something to eat.He came across two men.One was sitting under a tree reading a book; the other was typing away on his typewriter.The lion...

A frog goes into a bank and hops up to a teller. He can see from her name plate that she is called Patricia Whack, so he says "Ms. Whack, I'd like to borrow $30,000, please."The teller asks for his...

A frog came into a bank to obtain a loan.He spoke to the loan officer Mr. Paddywack.When Mr. Paddywack asked the frog what he had for loan collateral, the frog held out his hand."What's that?"...

A couple of pigeons made a date to meet on the ledge outside the tenth floor of a skyscraper.The female was there on time, but the male arrived an hour late.“Where were you? I was...