There was a little boy named Johnny who used to hang out at the local corner market. The owner didn't know what Johnny's problem was, but the boys would constantly tease him. They would always...

Two children were in a doctor's waiting room. The little girl was softly sobbing. "Why are you crying?" asked the little boy. "I'm here for a blood test, and they're going...

There was once this guy who was on a quest to cross the Sahara desert solo, we will call him Simon, for that is a good name for a camel rider. Well he started out and things were going along just...

The 6th grade science teacher, Mrs. Parks, asked her class, "Which human body part increases to ten times its size when stimulated?" No one answered until little Mary stood up,...

A couple is having a nice dinner at a local restaurant having a good time telling blonde jokes. Suddenly a blonde approached them and slapped her hand down on the table. She angrily tells them that...

A redneck is walking along the beach in France. There are many beautiful women lying in the sun, and he really wants to meet one. But try as he might, the women don't seem to be at all interested....

A bear and a rabbit are walking together and they find a magic lamp. They decide to rub it and a genie comes out. The genie says, "Thank you for releasing me I will give you both 3...

What is the difference between a BMW & a porcupine? A porcupine has pricks on the outside.

A guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for three shots of whiskey. The bartender asks, "What happened?" The guy replies, "I just found out my younger brother is...

An old preacher was dying. He sent a message for his IRS agent and his Lawyer (both church members), to come to his home. When they arrived, they were ushered up to his bedroom. As they...

College Entrance Exam, Football-Player Version Time Limit: 3 Weeks Name: _____________________________ 1. What language is spoken in France? 2. Give a dissertation on the...

One day, a little boy wrote to Santa Clause, "Please send me a sister." Santa Clause wrote him back, "Ok, send me your mother."

Why did the blonde take a right into the ditch? Her blinker was on.

A lawyer is standing in a long line at the box office. Suddenly, he feels a pair of hands kneading his shoulders, back, and neck. The lawyer turns around. "What the hell do you think you're...

A Blonde is getting on an elevator and meets a gentleman on board. "T.G.I.F." she says. "S.H.I.T" was his reply. Puzzled she replied "T.G.I.F" ...

A blonde is like a turtle, If either one is on their back, they are screwed!

3 vampires walk into a bar and the first orders a blood marry. Then the second orders a blood marry too. Then the third orders a glass of hot water. The other two vampires say, " what are...

A blonde is like a door knob, everyone gets a turn!

Two pieces of string walk into a bar and the bartender looks at them suspiciously.He says"Sorry, boys, we don't serve your kind here."So the pieces of string walk out again. They're sitting in the...

One night in a local pub, a man stumbled up to the only other patron in a bar and asked if he could buy him a drink. "Why of course," came the reply. The first man then asked,"Where are you from?"...