A woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband stalking around with a fly swatter."What are you doing?" She asked."Hunting Flies" He responded."Oh!, Killed any?" She asked."Yep, 3 males, 2...

How do you catch a unique animal?You 'neak up on it.

A hound dog and a dalmation were sitting in an Internet cafe and thedalmation said to the hound, "Hey, check out my web site!"The hound asked for the address and the dalmation...

I had a near death experience that has changed me forever. The other day I went horseback riding. Everything was going fine until the horse started bouncing out of control. I tried with all my...

How Does a dummy kill a mole?He buries it.

Where do you find a turtle with no arms and no legs?Wherever you put it, dumbass.

How do you stop a dog who's humping your leg?hack him off!

What would you call an Arab who owns a harem of cows?A milk sheik!

A guy goes into a doctor's office with a frog growing out of his head."Tell me how it started," says the doctor."It started out as a bump on my ass," says the frog.

What's grey, yellow, grey, yellow, grey, yellow, grey, yellow, grey, yellow, grey, yellow?An elephant rolling down a hill with a daisy in its mouth!

A guy walking down a street one afternoon passes an old man sitting on the side of the road with a large sack.The younger guy says to the old man, "Watcha got in the sack?"The old man responds, "I...

A ducks walks into a bar and asks, "Got any grapes?"The bartender, confused, tells the ducks that no, his bar doesn't serve grapes. The duck thanks him and leaves.The next day, the duck returns and...

A guy was standing in front of the gorilla cage at the zoo one day, when a gust of wind swept some dust into his eye. As he rubbed his eyelid, the gorilla went crazy, bent open the bars, and beat...

What weighs 2000 pounds and lays at the bottom of the ocean?Moby's Dick!

A football player walked into a motel on a rainy night. He asked the manager for a room for one night. The manager said, "I only have one room left and I don't think you want it." The football...

What's black and brown and looks good on a lawyer?A Doberman pinscher.

A guy walked into a bar with a pet alligator by his side. He put the alligator up on the bar and turned to the astonished patrons. "I'll make you a deal. I'll open this alligator's mouth and place...

A lady with a frog stuck to her head comes to the doctor's office.When the doctor asked her what's wrong the frog says, “I got something stuck to my ass!â�

Look over there! Said the frightened skunk to his pal.“There’s a human with a gun, and he’s getting closer and closer! What are we going to...

Why are French tramps like Princess Diana?Because you'll find them smashed against the wall of a Paris underpass on Saturday nights.