What do cows read in the morning?The daily moos!

What do you call a cow murder mystery?A moo-done-it.

A farmer rears 25 young hens and one old cock.As the old cock could no longer handle his job efficiently, the farmer buys one young cock from the market and puts it in the pen with the old cock and...

Yo mama is so poor, I stepped on a cigarette and she said,''Why did you put out my fire?''

A chinese man walks into a shop with a parrot on his shoulder, and the shopkeeper says, "Blimey, where did you get that?". And the parrot says, "China, there's loads of 'em there".

Chicken to turkey: "Only Thanksgiving and Christmas???You're lucky, with us it's any Sunday."

Why did the chicken run onto the football field?Because the umpire called a foul.

1. Cats rule. Dogs drool.2. Cats rub your leg when they want affection, not when they're horny.3. Cats use a litter box. Dogs use your leg.4. In 1996, over 10,000 US deaths were attributed to a dog...

They are independent.They don't listen.They don't come in when you call.They like to stay out all night.When you are trying to get things done, they want your attention.When they are home, they...

For all of you with teenagers or who have had teenagers, or are a teenager, you may want to know why they really have a lot in common with cats:1. Neither teenagers nor cats turn their heads when...

A son walks into the living room and asks his dad to borrow the car because he has a hot date. The dad says, ''Sure, as soon as you cut your long hair.''The boy smiles and thinking he has...

What's black and white and red all over?An embarassed zebra!

What's the difference between a bird and a fly?A bird can fly but a fly can't bird.

What's the difference between a smart blonde and Bigfoot?Maybe someday we'll find Bigfoot.

Q: Why do gorillas have big noses?A: Because they have big fingers

Why did Beethoven kill his chicken?It kept saying,''Bach, Bach, Bach...''

Two campers were hiking in the forest when all of a sudden a bear jumps out of a bush and starts chasing them. Both campers start running for their lives,when one of them stops and starts to put on...

Q: What do you get if you cross a bear with a toilet? A: Winnie the Pooh!

No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize a cat.

How do you identify a bald eagle?All his feathers are combed over to one side.