General * Never take a beer to a job interview. * Always identify people in your yard before shooting at them. * It's considered tacky to take a cooler to church. * If you have to vacuum the bed,...

I'm glad I'm a man, you better believe; I don't live off of yogurt, diet coke, or cottage cheese. I don't bitch to my girlfriends about the size of my breasts; I can get where I want to -- north,...

I'm glad I'm a woman, yes I am, yes I am; I don't live off of Budweiser, beer nuts and Spam. I don't brag to my buddies about my erections; I won't drive to Hell before I ask for directions. I...