A woman is in bed with her lover who happens to be her husband's best friend. They make love for hours, and afterwards, while they're just laying there, the phone rings. Since it is the woman's...

Well, a Scotsman clad in kilt left the bar one evening fair And one could tell by how he walked that he'd drunk more than his share He fumbled 'round until he could no longer keep his feet ...

Yo mama's so short, she had 2 cuff her panties.

yo momma so fat she has to use the highway as a slip and slide!

One Sunday morning, as was his custom, the pastor of a small church had all the children come up front for a brief children's church. He enjoyed asking the children various questions, and hearing...

Boy: " Miss, May I kiss you?" Girl: "No." Boy: " Could you let me embrace your waist with my arms?" Girl: "No." Boy:" Well, then, May I...

I always look for a woman who has a tattoo. I see a woman with a tattoo, and I'm thinking, okay, here's a gal who's capable of making a decision she'll regret in the future.

Why don't blind people sky dive? Because it scares the crap outta the dog.

Please note that Banks are installing new "Drive-through" teller machines. Customers will be able to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles. To enable customers to use this new...

During a recent vacation in Atlantic City, a couple went to see a popular magic show. After one especially amazing feat, a woman from the back of the theater yelled out, "Hey, how'd you do...

One night an 87 year old woman came home from Bingo to find her 92 year old husband in bed with another woman. She became violent and ended up pushing him off the balcony of their 20th floor...

A neutron walks into a bar and asks how much for a drink. The bartender replies, "for you, no charge".

Yo Momma so dumb, she was killed in a pie eating contest when the cow sat on her!

A man was watching television when there was a knock on the door. He answered it, but only a snail was there. So he picked it up and threw it into the street. Two years later, the man heard...

Teacher: Recite your tables to me, Joan. Joan: Dining table, kitchen table, bedside table...

A waiter asks a man, "May I take your order, sir?" "Yes," the man replies. "I'm just wondering, exactly how do you prepare your chickens?" "Nothing...

A mother and her young son returned from the grocery store and began putting away the groceries. The boy opened the box of animal crackers and spread them all over the table. "What are you...

Three turtles, Joe, Steve, and Poncho, decide to go on a picnic. Joe packs the picnic basket with cookies, bottled sodas, and sandwiches. The trouble is, the picnic site is 10 miles away, so the...

There are 99 Blonds on a plane and 1 Brunette. The captain radios in that they are going down, So they drop all the luggage. They were still going down so they drop out all the chairs. They were...

A young brunette used to always wonder why her blonde best friend would get a's on all her tests and the brunette would get A-'s she thought that was a little weird so one day she asked her friend...