Most people assume WWJD is for "What would Jesus do?" But the initials really stand for "What would Jesus drive?" One theory is that Jesus would tool around in an old...

Molly wrote a letter to Santa Claus one day. Dear Santa, Please give me a Workout Barbie and a new milkman because he is sleeping with Mommy. Love, ...

A Briton, a Frenchman and a Russian are viewing a painting of Adam and Eve frolicking in the Garden of Eden. "Look at their reserve, their calm," muses the Brit. "They must be...

A woman who had just been married to a gambling man had learned upon marrying him that he always came home well after midnight. She didn't like this one bit and no amount of reasoning with...

Librarian: "Please be quiet. The people next to you can't read." Boy: "What a shame! I've been reading since I was six."

There were four blonde's sitting on the bank of a river, each with a fishing pole intently concentrating on the task at hand. A Game Warden drives by and see's the four women apparently...

Dear God: Let me give you a list of just some of the things I must remember to be a good dog: 1. I will not eat the cats' food before they eat it or after they throw it up. 2. I will...

Dear God: Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell one another? Dear God: When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch...or is it going to be the same old...

A lawyer died. At the same moment, the Pope also died. They arrived at the gates of heaven at the same moment. They spend the day in orientation, and as they're getting their heavenly vestments,...

This is a true story that happened in a South African hospital. There was this case in the hospital where a patient always died in the same bed and on a Friday morning regardless of his...

How do you titillate an ocelot? Oscillate its tit a lot!

"Mummy, I'm bored." "Go and wacth Daddy work. He's in the bedroom." A while later... "Mummy, I just saw Daddy in bed on top of another woman. What was he...

A pirate walks into a bar and has a seat. The bartender notices the pirates peg-leg, eyepatch and hook for a hand. The bartender and the pirate start talking and the bartender casually slips in...

A Buddhist and a Hindu went skydiving together. As they prepared to jump, the Buddhist said, "If anything should go wrong--" "Nothing will go wrong," said the Hindu....

A blonde wanted to sell her car but failed many times. Even though the car looked pratically new it had over 400 000 miles on it.So she goes to a bar and theres a brunette sitting a few barstools...

A priest came to a dying author to read him his last rites. "Do you reject the devil?" asked the priest. "This is no time to be making enemies," replied the author.

A Blonde was down on her luck. In order to raise some money, she decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom. She went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told...

A faith healer asked Moshe how his family was getting along. "They're all fine," Moshe said, "Except my uncle. He's very sick." "Your uncle is not sick," the...

Sherlock Holmes stood at the Gates of Heaven pulling at his pipe awaiting his turn. "I'll let you in," said St. Peter, gesturing toward the heavenly throngs behind him, "if you'll...

Mothers of teens know why animals eat their young.