1. Describe your problem:__________________________________________ 2. Now, describe the problem accurately:__________________________________________ 3. Speculate wildly about the cause of the...

You know it is time to reassess your relationship with your computer when....1. You wake up at 4 O'clock in the morning to go to the bathroom and stop to check your email on the way back to bed.2....

A software expert claims:“My software never has bugs -- it just develops random features.â�

Did you hear about the two radio antenhnas that got married?The wedding was terrible, but the reception was excellent!

Q: Why didn't Intel call the Pentium, the 586?A: Because they added 486 and 100 on the first Pentium and got 585.999983605.

Q: How many Object Oriented programmers does it take to change a lightbulb?A: None, they send it a message, and it changes itself.

Did you hear that Netscape is moving to Tel-Aviv, Israel?They're going to rename themself "Netan-Yahoo"

My computer isn`t that nervous...it`s just a bit ANSI.Terminal glare: A look that kills...Life would be much easier if I had the source codeComputers are only human.To iterate is human; to recurse,...

The Yankees have a monopoly game.The Mets have a monopoly game.Microsoft has a monopoly, no game but a lesson for us all.

1. You must first remove the plastic cover. By doing so you agree to accept and honor Microsoft rights to all TV dinners. 2. You may not give anyone else a bite of your dinner (which would...

If Microsoft operated Restaurants Patron: Waiter!Waiter: Hi, my name is Bill, and I'll be your SupportWaiter. What seems to be the problem?Patron: There's a fly in my soup!Waiter: Try again, maybe...

Q: How many Microsoft engineers does it take to screw in a light bulb?A: None. They just declare darkness the standard 

1. Every time they repainted the lines on the road you would have to buy a new car.2. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason, and you would just accept this, restart and drive...

NORTH POLE (API) - MICROSOFT announced an agreement with Santa Claus Industries to acquire Christmas at a press conference held via satellite from Santa's summer estate somewhere in the southern...