Q. What's purple and leaps from tree to tree?A. Squirrel!Q. Then why is it purple?A. It choked on a nut...'

What did the cat say to the mouse?"The human telling this joke is attempting to anthropomorphise us!"

Q: There is a house. The front is facing south and the back is facing north. The right side is facing west and the left side is facing east. If a rooster lays an egg on top of the house which way...

A woman came up behind her husband while he was enjoying his morning coffee and slapped him on the back of the head."I found a piece of paper in your pants pocket with the name 'Marylou' written on...

Why did the chicken cross the road in Missouri?To show the opossum it could be done.

Question: Why does Tigger smell?Answer: You'd smell too if you played with Pooh all day!

God created the donkey & said to him : " You will work unceasingly from sunrise to sunset carrying burdens on your back. You will eat grass, you will have no intelligence & you will live 50...

A little girl walks into a pet shop and asks in the sweetest little lisp: "Excuthe me, mithter, do you keep wittle wabbits?" And the shopkeeper gets down on his knees, so that he's on her...

There once was a toad that was excluded from all Green Toad activities because he was a handsome shade of yellow. So he went to visit a beautiful fairy in the town over who had the power to grant...

Do you know what a wok is?It's something you throw at a wabbit.

Q: Why does a chicken coop have only two doors?A: Because if it had four it would be a sedan!

Yo mama is so small that she plays handball on the curb.

Yo' mama so fat, she has to use a telephone pole as a tampon!

Yo' mama's so fat, she broke the stairway to heaven!

Yo Mama is so fat, her ass has it's own congressman.

How do you make a cat be a dog?Pour gasoline on it and light it with a match. It will go 'WOOF.'

You're so fat that when you went to the zoo, the hippos got jealous.

You're so ugly, your mom has to tie a steak around your neck just to get the dog to play with you.

The front door was accidentally left open and our dog was gone. After unsuccessfully whistling and calling, my husband got in the car and went looking for him.He drove around the neighborhood for...

You so dumb, you go up to a cow and ask for 2%!