A drunk walks into a bar and says to the bartender - "Get everyone here a drink on me, and get one for yourself too" The bartender pours a round of drinks, including one for himself, then says to...

This man is sitting in a bar and notices two lovely women across the way. He calls the bartender over and says, "I'd like to buy those two ladies a drink." The bartender replies, "It won't do...

Three vampires went into a bar and sat down. The barmaid came over to take their orders. "And what would you, er, gentlemen like tonight?" The first vampire said, "I'll have a mug of blood."...

This big, nasty, sweaty woman, wearing a sleeveless sundress, walks into a bar. She raises her right arm, revealing a big, hairy armpit as she points to all the people sitting at the bar and asks,...

An attorney went into a bar for a Martini and found himself beside a scruffy-looking drunk who kept mumbling and studying something in his hand. He leaned closer while the drunk held the tiny...

A drunken man walks into a biker bar, sits down at the bar and orders a drink. Looking around, he sees three huge, leather-suited men sitting at a corner table. He gets up, staggers to the table,...

A drunken man gets on the bus late one night, staggers up the aisle, and sits next to an elderly woman. She looks the man up and down and says, "I've got news for you. You're going straight to...

A man is having a few drinks at a bar when he looks over and notices a drunk guy passed out at a table nearby. The bartender tells him the drunk is Mr. Murphy and asks the man if he could drive...

A man and his girlfriend are at a bar when the girl goes to the bathroom. When she comes back she's crying. Her boyfriend asks her what happend. "As I was leaving the bathroom, a big guy at...

A rather confident man walks into a bar and takes a seat next to a very attractive woman. He gives her a quick glance, then casually looks at his watch for a moment. The woman notices this and...

This man walks into a bar, and walks up to the bar, and asks the bartender for three shots of Glen Fiddich Single Malt Scotch whisky. The bartender lines them up on the counter, and the man...

At the end of a tiny deserted bar sits a huge Mexican. He's having a few beers when a short, well dressed, and obviously gay man walks in and sits beside him. After three or four beers, the gay...

There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour. Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and...

A farmer was sitting in the neighborhood bar getting drunk. A man came in and asked the farmer, "Hey, why are you sitting here on this beautiful day, getting drunk?" The farmer shook his head...

A man was sitting at the bar in his local, enjoying an after work drink when an exceptionally gorgeous and sexy young lady walks in. She is so striking that the man could not take his eyes away...

A man goes into a bar and seats himself on a stool. The bartender looks at him and says, "What'll it be buddy?" The man says, "Set me up with seven whiskey shots and make them doubles." The...

A guy is having a drink in a bar. A lot of drinks. A very dark bar. He leans over to the big woman next to him and says, "Do you wanna hear a funny blonde joke?" The big woman replies,...

A guy goes into a bar. He's sitting on the stool, enjoying his drink when he hears, "You look great!" He looks around - there's nobody near him. He hears the voice again, "No really, you look...

A man walks into a bar, sits down on a bench and orders a cold one. He swigs down the beer, looks in his pocket, cringes and orders another. He gulps down that one, looks in his pocket again,...

The local bar was so sure its bartender was the strongest man around that they offered a standing $1000 bet. The bartender would squeeze a lemon until all the juice ran into a glass, and hand the...