A guy walked into a bar one day and said to the barman, "Give me six double vodkas." The barman says, "Wow! you must have had one hell of a day." "Yes, I've just found out my older brother is gay."...

A bunch of guys are sitting at the local bar. They get pretty drunk, and the topic turns to Bubba at the end of the bar who, as everyone knows, has the biggest dick in town. One of the guys gets...

Buffallo Billy had a ten-foot willy He showed it to the girl next door She thought it was a snake So she whacked it with a rake And now it's only five foot four

Q: How did Dairy Queen get pregnant?A: Burger King forgot to wrap his Whopper.

Two old ladies were standing on a street corner smoking cigarettes. It started to rain and one lady said, ''Great, now I'll have to put this out.''The other lady said, ''No you don't, i have some...

A businessman boards a flight and is lucky enough to be seated next to an absolutely gorgeous woman. They exchange brief hellos and he notices she is reading a manual about sexual statistics.He...

Big Busted Women-can get a taxi on the worst days-have a neat place to carry spare change-have always been the center of the arts (art)-make jogging a spectator sport-can keep a magazine dry while...

Q: Did you hear about the man who swallowed his Viagra too slowly?A: He got a stiff neck

The wife of an older man is distraught because her husband's 'little soldier' can't salute anymore.She goes to her local doctor and explains the situation and the doctor just feels plain bad for...

One day a little girl came running into her house yelling, "Mommy, I got five dollars!" The mother was curious, so she asked her child where she got the five dollars from. The little girl replied,...

What do guys and ceramic tiles have in common?Lay them right the first time and you can walk on them for the rest of your life!

One day a teacher went into her class room and saw the word, “penisâ� written in small letters on the chalkboard. She erased it and went on with the day's lesson. The next...

A man decided to march in the holy crusades. Concluding that his wife should wear a chastity belt while he is gone, he locks up her nether regions and gives the key to his best friend. He tells...

Three girls are sitting around, totally bored so one girl suggests that they make up nicknames for their ideal boyfriends and name them after soda pops."I want mine to be 7-Up, 'cause 7 days a week...

A chicken and an egg are lying in bed. The chicken is smoking a cigarette with a satisfied smile on its face. The egg is frowning and looking very frustrated.The egg mutters, to no one in...

An old man in Mississippi is sitting on his front porch watching the sun rise.  He sees the neighbor's kid walk by carrying something big under his arm. "Hey boy, whatcha got there?" "Roll...

Children in the back of the car cause accidents.Accidents in the back of the car cause children.

One day three old ladies were sitting on a park bench and this guy jumped out of the bushes and flashed them.The first lady had a stroke, the second one had a stroke, and the third one's arm was...

Mama always told me girls are like a box of chocolate covered-cherries: they can either be dark or light on the outside, but they're always pink on the inside.

A little girl is in line to see Santa. When it's her turn, she climbs up on Santa's lap. Santa asks, "What would you like Santa to bring you for Christmas?"The little girl replies, "I want a Barbie...