In the Garden of Eden stood AdamWith his hand in the crack of his madam.It filled him with mirth'Cause on this whole earth,There were only two balls and he had 'em.

Why don't they teach drivers ed. and sex ed. in the same day in Arkansas?It's too hard on the mules.

One day, while Sue was cleaning under the bed, she found a small box. Curious, she opened it and found 3 eggs and 10,000 dollars. A little bit suspicious, she confronted her husband of twenty years...

What did the Egyptian man say to the Egyptian woman?"Come behind the pyramid, and I'll make you a mummy!"

When I was young, I had no sense, Stuck my dick in an electric fence. It curled my hairs, it tickled my balls, It made me crap my overalls.

Why is Clinton having such a hard time deciding what to do with Elian Gonzalez?Because the last time he decided where to put a Cuban he was almost impeached.

A man walked into the ladies department of a Macy's, and walked up to the woman behind the counter and said, "I'd like to buy a bra for my wife"What type of bra?" asked the clerk."Type?" inquires...

What's the difference between erotic and kinky?Erotic is when you use a feather, kinky is when you use the whole chicken!

Ru Paul, Bill Gates, and Roger Ebert are all struck by lightning on the same day. All three find themselves in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates. They start begging him to give them another...

The other day, my friends and I went to this Ladies Night Club. One of the girls wanted to impress us, so she pulled out a $10 bill. The dancer came over to us, and my friend licked the $10 and...

Scientists have released a new form of Viagra, it comes in an eyedrop form and makes you look well hard.

Why do women rub there eys when they getup in the morning?Because they don't have balls to scratch.

Why do women have sex with their eyes closed?Because they can't stand seeing a man having a good time!

What's the definition of innocence?A nun working in a condom factory, thinking she's making little sleeping bags for mice.

When is the only time you should fake an orgasm?When you have a Rotweiller rooting your leg.

A girl was going on her first date and her grandmother gave her some advice: “The boy may try to kiss you -- it will feel good, but don't do it. He may try to go up your skirt -- but...

There was a guy who was struggling to decide what to wear to go to a fancy costume party... Then he had a bright idea.When the host answered the door, he found the guy standing there with no shirt...

A teacher asks her class of 3rd graders to use the word "fascinate" in a sentence. She calls on a small boy sitting in the front row."I saw an airshow. And it was very fascinating.""Good, but I...

Once there was a man named BB. He had a very fat wife and for his 40th b-day she went and got a B tattooed on each butt cheek. She went home and showed BB and she asked who BoB was!

A boy was playing with himself in the bathtub when his father walked in and said, “Son, if you don't stop doing that, you'll go blind.â� The boy said, “Dad,...