A mechanical engineer died & went to heaven. Upon arrival Saint Peter checked "THE BOOK" and didn't find his name, so he informed the engineer that he must get on the elevator and go...

A corporate executive received a monthly bill from the law firm that was handling a big case for his company. It included hourly billing for conferences, research, phone calls, and everything but...

"Doctor," she asks nervously, "can you get pregnant from anal sex?" "Certainly," replies the doctor, "Where do you think lawyers come from!"

A lady about 8 months pregnant got on a bus. She noticed the man opposite her was smiling at her. She immediately moved to another seat. This time the smile turned into a grin, so she moved again....

A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced ten husbands.On their wedding night, she told her new husband, "Please be gentle; I'm still a virgin. What?" said the puzzled groom. "How...

Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, an honest lawyer and an old drunk are walking down the street together when they simultaneously spot a hundred dollar bill. Who gets it? The old drunk, of course; the...

A new client had just come in to see a famous lawyer. "Can you tell me how much you charge?", said the client. "Of course", the lawyer replied, "I charge $200 to answer three questions!"...

Joe grew up in a small town, then moved away to attend college and law school. He decided to return home because he could be a big man in this small town. He really wanted to impress everyone....

A doctor, an engineer, a rabbi and a lawyer were debating who was the world's first professional. The Doctor said "It must have been a doctor. Who else could have helped with the world's first...

The board of directors of a prominent multinational corporation met to hire a replacement for their retiring CEO. On the list of applicants were three men, an accountant, a mathematician and a...

Taking his seat in his chambers, the judge faced the opposing lawyers. "So," he said, "I have been presented, by both of you, with a bribe." Both lawyers squirmed uncomfortably. "You, attorney...

Carlson was charged with stealing a Mercedes Benz, and after a long trial, the jury aquitted him. Later that day Carlson came back to the judge who had presided at the hearing. "Your honor,"...

A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter methodically placing ''Love'' stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them. He then...

This is the best lawyer story of the year, decade, and probably the century. A Charlotte, NC, lawyer purchased a box of very rare and expensive cigars,: then insured them against fire among other...

It seems that there's a fence between Heaven and Hell, which had fallen into disrepair. St. Peter sought out Satan. "Hey, Satan, it's your turn to fix the fence. The big guy says it looks...

A big city lawyer went duck hunting in South Louisiana. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other side of a fence. As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly...

A lawyer, a priest, and a young boy were in a plane that was going to crash, yet they only had 2 parachutes.  The lawyer proclaimed that since he was the smartest man on the plane, that he...

One evening, after attending the theater, two gentlemen were walking down the avenue when they observed a rather well dressed and attractive young lady walking ahead of them. One of them turned to...

A local United Way office realized that the organization had never received a donation from the town's most successful lawyer. The person in charge of contributions called him to persuade him to...

Mrs. Hunter was called to serve for jury duty, but asked to be excused because she didn't believe in capital punishment and didn't want her personal thoughts to prevent the trial from running it's...