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miscellaneous jokes Page 16 of 23
May 15, 2005
Lorena Bobbit
167 hits
Q: What did Michael Jackson say to Lorena Bobbit for celebrity fun?A: "SILLY Bobbit! Dicks are for KIDS!"
Nov 21, 1924
Macaulay Culkin
140 hits
Q: Why did Michael invite Macaulay Culkin to the house?A: He's like the little boy he never had.
Aug 25, 2005
Made a pizza
129 hits
What did the paparazzi do with the little bits of Di's body before the pigs arrived?Made a pizza and took pictures of it!
Sep 30, 2005
Magic Johnson
136 hits
Q. Why can't the government put Magic Johnson on a stamp?A. Everyone would be afraid to lick it.
Jul
5, 2005
Make him bark
109 hits
Q. When you pat a dog on its head he will wag his tail. What will a goose do?A. Paul Lynde: "Make him bark."
May
2, 2005
Malt Whiskey
96 hits
Q: What do Michael Jackson and Malt Whiskey have in common?A: They both come in tots.
Sep
9, 2005
Merc function properly
117 hits
Why didnt the airbag on the Merc function properly? It was strapped into a safety belt in the back seat.
May 14, 2005
Mercedes 600
94 hits
What's the difference between a Mercedes 600 and a can of spam? They give you a key to get the meat out a can of spam.
Jun
2, 2005
Mercedes and a Porsche
192 hits
What's the difference between a Mercedes and a Porsche? Diana wouldn't be seen dead in a Porsche! Or... ... a BMW... a Lada... etc.
Sep 13, 2005
Mercedes and Princess Diana
152 hits
What's the difference between a Mercedes and Princess Diana? A Mercedes will easily reach 40.
Jul
1, 2005
Mercedes BENZ
104 hits
What did Prince Charles say when he heard about the automobile accident? Well, that's the way the Mercedes BENZ.
Sep
1, 2005
Mercedes like
106 hits
Why is a Mercedes like a squid? They've both got Di in them when they're opened.
Sep
7, 2005
Mercedes straights
116 hits
I've heard they are changing the name of Mercedes to Mercedes straights, because they don't benz very well.
Jun
3, 2005
Mercedes Syndrome
126 hits
Did you hear that Princess Diana was suffering from PMS? Pulverised Mercedes Syndrome.
Jul
6, 2005
Michael actually proposition
103 hits
Q: How did Michael actually proposition the little boy?A: It was just a slip of the tongue.
Jul 20, 2005
Michael and Connie Chung
114 hits
Q. What's the difference between Michael and Connie Chung?A. Michael's been able to have kids.
Aug 23, 2005
Michael and Lisa Marie
116 hits
Q: What did Elvis say after seeing Michael and Lisa Marie on television?A: "Boy, that's a relief. I though she married a black guy!"
Sep
8, 2005
Michael been appearing
122 hits
Q: Why has Michael been appearing on children's shows lately?A: He has a lot to plug.
Apr 26, 2005
Michael cutting down
137 hits
Q: Why's Michael cutting down on public appearances?A: He wants to spend more time with the kids.
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