A customer sent an order to a distributor for a large amount of goods totaling a great deal of money. The distributor noticed that the previous bill hadn't been paid. The collections manager left...

An applicant was filling out a job application. When he came to the question, "Have you ever been arrested?" he wrote, "No." The next question, intended for people who had answered...

A Government Employee sits in his office and out of boredom, decides to see what's in his old filing cabinet. He pokes through the contents and comes across an old brass lamp. "This will look nice...

I had been doing Tech Support for Hewlett-Packard's DeskJet division for about a month when I had a customer call with a problem I just couldn't solve. She could not print yellow. All the other...

Dear Bo$$, A$ all of u$ have read from the new$paper, the $ingapore economy ha$ come out of the rece$$ion. In thi$ life, we all need $omething mo$t de$peratele. I think you $hould $how...

AN AMERICAN CORPORATION You have two cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. You are surprised when the cow drops dead.  A SOUTH AFRICAN CORPORATION You...

What is the difference between your job and your wife? After 20 years your job still sucks.

Things To Say If You Get Caught Sleeping At Your Desk 15. "They told me at the blood bank this might happen." 14. "This is just a 15 minute power-nap like they raved about in the last time...

I JUST KNEW I WAS IN BIG TROUBLE AT WORK WHEN... ...the new policy on sexual harassment included a photo of me. ...the Security guard made a complete inventory of my work area. ...my...

A man was being interviewed for a job. "Were you in the service?" ask the interviewer. "Yes, I was a marine," responded the applicant. "Did you see any active duty?" "I was in...

1. Make race car noises when anyone gets on or off. 2. Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your kleenex to other passengers. 3. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and...

1. I am currently out at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get the position. Be prepared for my mood.  2. I'm not really out of the office. I'm just ignoring you. 3....

A young banker decided to get his first tailor made suit. So he went to the finest tailor in town and got measured for a suit. A week later he went in for his first fitting. He put on the suit and...

A tape of God talking to a banker: Banker: What is a million years like to you? God: Like one second. Banker: What is a million dollars like to you? ...

TECH: Hello, Friendly Internet. May I help you? CUSTOMER: Oh, hello young man. I was wondering if you offer online banking? TECH: We're an Internet service provider, ma'am. You can certainly...

After the annual office party blow-out, Colin woke up with a pounding headache, cotton-mouthed, and utterly unable to recall the events of the preceding evening. After a trip to the bathroom he...

The boss of Stone Marketing called a spontaneous staff meeting in the middle of a particularly stressful week. When everyone gathered, the employer, who understood the benefits of having fun, told...

Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice. Find out where your boss shops and buy exactly the same outfits. Wear them one day after you boss does. This is especially effective...

This is an actual job application someone submitted at a fast-food establishment........ NAME: Greg Bulmash DESIRED POSITION: Reclining. Ha ha. But seriously, whatever's available. If I was...

1. Never give me work in the morning Always wait until 4:00pm and then bring it to me The challenge of a deadline is refreshing 2. If it's really a "rush job" run in and interrupt me every 10...