Five days before Christmas, Santa was having a horrible day. And by horrible, I mean his wife was sick with the flu, 23 elfs called in sick, and nothing was getting done, so they were really...

It was the day after Christmas at a church in San Francisco. Pastor Mike was looking at the nativity scene outside when he noticed the baby Jesus was missing from the figures. Immediately,...

The temporary Sunday School teacher was struggling to open a combination lock on the supply cabinet. She had been told the combination, but couldn't quite remember it. She went to the...

A married man goes to confessional and tells the priest, "I had an affair with a woman... almost." The priest says, "What do you mean, almost?" The man says,...

You know your a redneck when there is 15 cars in your driveway and the only one that moves is your house.

With so much turmoil in the world, God decided to pay a visit to earth to check things out. He strolled into a bar and approached the first man he saw. "If you believe in me enough to give me...

The new priest is nervous about hearing confessions, so he asks an older priest to sit in on his sessions. The new priest hears a couple confessions, then the old priest asks him to step out of the...

Q. Why was Moses the most wicked man? A. He broke all 10 Commandments at once. Q. What animal could Noah not trust? A. The cheetah. Q. What kind of lights did Noah use on the...

3 men die in a car wreck and are sent to the pearly gates. Having all lived good lives they were all allowed in but they had certain restrictions. God told them that he would ask them a question....

John Smith was the only Protestant to move into a large Catholic neighborhood. On the first Friday of Lent, John was outside grilling a big juicy steak on his grill. Meanwhile, all of his...

A minister delivered a sermon in 10 minutes one Sunday morning, which was about half the usual length of his sermons. He explained, "I regret to inform you that my dog, who is very fond of...

Muldoon lived alone in the Irish countryside with only a pet dog for his company. One day the dog died, and Muldoon went to the parish priest and asked, " Father, me dog is dead. Could ya' be...

A woman was at her hairdresser's getting her hair styled for a trip to Rome with her husband. She mentioned the trip to the hairdresser, who responded: "Rome? Why would anyone want...

Dear Friend, The other day I went up to a local Christian bookstore and saw a "honk if you love Jesus" bumper sticker. I was feeling particularly sassy that day because I had just...

Apparently the leading nominee for the papacy... is Paul Wolfowitz.

After a hardy Indiana rainstorm filled all the potholes in the streets and alleys, a young mother watched her two little boys playing in the puddle through her kitchen window. The older of the two,...

A priest, a minister and a guru sat discussing the best positions for prayer while a telephone repairman worked nearby. "Kneeling is definitely the best way to pray," the priest said. ...

An explorer in the deepest Amazon suddenly finds himself surrounded by a bloodthirsty group of cannibals. Upon surveying the situation, he says quietly to himself, "Oh God, I'm...

A pious man, who had reached the age of 105, suddenly stopped going to synagogue. Alarmed by the old fellow's absence after so many years of faithful attendance, the Rabbi went to see him. He...

One day, two monks were in the vaults of the monastery going through the old scrolls. "You see, there are the originals," said the first monk. "All the new scrolls were copied...