Your mama cooks so bad, your family prays after they eat!

Yo momma is so fat I had to take five trains, eight cars, and twelve airplanes just to get around her!

Q: Why did the blonde get pulled over by a police officer? A: Because her headlights weren't working so she flashed everybody that came past.

Blondes are like pooltables every time you put a dollar in she'll rack your balls.

How does a blonde kill a fish? She drowns it.

Yo momma's so fat that a car hit her and she turned around and said "Hey! Who threw that rock!"

What kind of flashlight do blond's use? The solar powered kind!

Yo mama so fat she can give the homeless a home.

Yo Momma so lazy she thinks a two-income family is where yo daddy has 2 jobs.

Your mama is so fat she put on a red coat, walked outside, and everyone started yelling, "Kool-Aid, Kool-Aid"

Your mammas so fat she has more rolls than the bakery shop

Why is it so hard to make a blond snowman??? Because you have to hollow out its head!!!!!

Why did the elephant call the locksmith? Because he lost his keys in his trunk!

You mum's so fat that when she Bungee jumps, the bridge falls down.

Which sea will make you go ape? The Chimpansea.

What do you call a horse that escaped from jail? A Zebra.

What is a Cat's favourite Exercise? Puss-Ups!

What do you get when you cross a fish and a grizzly? A Bearacuda.

An Irish man walks out of a bar..............Hey, It could happen

I hear some rich guy wants to build a tavern at the top of Mount Everest. Talk about raising the bar high!